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Russian spokeswoman Maria Zakharova brilliantly mocks NATO’s suck up to Donald Trump

Here are some key parts of what NATO Secretary-General Jens Stoltenberg said in a recent op-ed in the Guardian.

Can you spot the Trump ass kissing going on here…

“We face the greatest challenges to our security in a generation. This is no time to question the value of the partnership between Europe and the United States.”

“In the last few years we have seen a dramatic deterioration of our security, with a more assertive Russia and turmoil across north Africa and the Middle East.”

Stoltenberg stressed NATO’s contribution to international security…“for 67 years this partnership has been the bedrock of peace, freedom and prosperity in Europe.”

“In these uncertain times we need strong American leadership, and we need Europeans to shoulder their fair share of the burden. But above all we need to recognize the value of the partnership between Europe and America. It remains indispensable.”

“So rather than deepening our differences, we need to nurture what unites us, and find the wisdom and foresight to work together for common solutions.”

Stoltenberg noted that the United States “going it alone is not an option, either for Europe or for the US.”

Stoltenberg recognized Trump’s demand that other NATO members pay their way as members…a cost that to date has fallen heavily on US shoulders…“The partnership between Europe and America is founded on deeply shared interests and common values. At the same time, a viable partnership depends on all contributing their fair share. The US currently accounts for almost 70 percent of NATO defense spending, and has rightly called for a more equitable sharing of the burden.” 

Russian Foreign Ministry spokeswoman, Maria Zakharova took to Facebook tell readers what NATO chief Stoltenberg actually meant to say in his Guardian post…

“Here’s the summary of the publication translated into, so to speak, the language of ‘real politics’.”… 

“Who’s going to pay the bills and boss us around? Who’s going to fund all this obscurantism, which we promote by Washington’s merit? As, in the past few years, we’ve forgotten how to think or act by ourselves.”

We went to great lengths to please the American establishment, including deploying troops and weaponry on our sovereign territories in the time of peace. How are we going to look our people in the eyes?!! They’ll never forgive us for this, especially after sanction wars, which undermined entire branches of our carefully built economy. And you [the US] will regret it when we start living on our own here.”

“We turned a blind eye to what the US did in Afghanistan. That the production of drugs … has grown many times. And these drugs are, in the first place, sent to us, to Europe. We remain silent about the fact that thousands of soldiers from NATO countries were hurt in America’s escapade in Iraq – not because we are ashamed, but because you have been paying us to do so.”

“And take a note, it was enough for us. We are even ready for a smaller allowance, if you wish so. We’ve agreed to spoil our relations with Russia, accusing it of all sins for the sake of the ruling US administration, which made a bid on anti-Russian policy to retain the White House.”

“Please understand, we don’t want to take our eye bandage off because then we’ll have to acknowledge not only that we have lost touch with reality, but also that we are naked. Forever yours, hopefully, NATO General-Secretary.”

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